The Chanukah Song Part III

<br>Put on your yarmulke<br>Here comes Chanukah<br>Once again it`s onaka<br>The miracle of Chanukah<br><br>Chanukah is the festival of lights<br>One day of presents, hell no, we get eight crazy nights<br>But if you still feel like the only kid in two without a Christmas tree<br>I guess my first two songs didn`t do it for you, so here comes number three<br><br>Ross and Phoebe from Friends say the Chanukah blessing<br>So does Lenny`s pal Squiggy and Will & Grace`s Debra Messing<br>Melissa Gilbert and Michael Landon never mix meat with dairy<br>Maybe they shoulda called that show "Little Kosher House on the Prairie"<br>We got Jerry Lewis, Ben Stiller, and Jack Black<br>Tom Arnold converted to Judaism, but you guys can have him back<br><br>We may not get to kiss underneath the mistletoe<br>But we can do it all night long with Deuce Bigalow, I`m Jewish<br><br>Put on your yarmulke, here comes Chanukah<br><br>The guy in Willie Nelson`s band who plays harmonica celebrates Chanukah<br><br>Osama bin Laden, not a big fan of the Jews<br>Well maybe that`s cuz he lost a figure skating match<br> to gold medalist Sarah Hughes, her mama`s Jewish<br>Houdini and David Blaine escape straightjackets with such precision<br>But the one thing they could not get out of - their painful circumcisions<br><br>As for half-Jewish actors, Sean Penn is quite the great one<br>And Marlon Brando, not a Jew at all, but it looks to me like he ate one<br>Gwenyth Paltrow`s half-Jewish, but a full time Oscar winner<br>Jennifer Conelly`s half-Jewish too, and I`d like to put some more in her<br><br>There`s Lou Reed, Perry Ferrell, Beck, and Paula Abdul<br>Joey Ramone invented punk rock music, but first came Hebrew School<br><br>Natalie Portmonika, it`s time to celebrate Chanukah<br>I hope I get an abtronika, on this joyful, toyful Chanukah<br>So get a high colonika, and soil your Long Johnikas<br>If you really, really wannaka<br>Have a happy, happy, happy, happy, happy, happy Chanukah