Four Wheel Drive

<br>(Bill Fries, Chip Davis)<br><br>We is screamin` through the valley<br>Where the Nishnabotna flows<br>Through the mud and crud and cornfields<br>Where the mari-ju-wana grows<br>`Cross the railroad tracks of Persia<br>Down the hills and up the dale<br>Had a CJ-5 with a four-wheel drive<br>And Smokey on my tail. <br><br>Well, he picked me up at exit 12<br>On the I-six-eighty ramp<br>I was doin` 67 per<br>When I rumbled through his trap<br>He commenced to whirl his flashin` lights<br>And he made his siren wail<br>I slipped on down to four-wheel drive<br>With Smokey on my tail <br><br>Now I got racin` stripes and dual pipes<br>And Smokey`s got a Ford<br>Got a mill with a four pot carb, you know<br>But Smokey`s stroked and bored<br>Well, the chase was on, but I had the edge<br>With a rig that`ll never fail<br>Got a CJ-5 with a four-wheel drive<br>And Smokey on my tail <br><br>Yeah, he was. <br><br>Well, I dropped on down to granny low<br>And I made a hard right turn<br>My big ol` fat Commando tires<br>Went slashin` through the corn<br>Well, the tassels blew<br>And the kernels flew<br>And it looked like yella hail<br>Just cookin` alive in a four-wheel drive<br>With Smokey on my tail <br><br>Well, we went screamin` through the valley<br>Where the Nishnabotna flows<br>Through the mud and crud and cornfields<br>Where the mari-ju-wana grows<br>`Cross the railroad tracks of Persia<br>Up the hills and down the dales<br>My CJ-5 with four-wheel drive<br>And Smokey on my tail. <br><br>[Imagine a series of comic-style thought balloons.] <br><br>Look out, now. Here he come. <br><br>Oh, we gonna get it on now. <br><br>(Don`t hit that fella with the banjo.) <br><br>We gonna swim this here creek now, Smokey. [Pronounced &quot;crick&quot;, of course.] <br><br>Yard wide and a foot deep. <br><br>&quot;Nishnabota River&quot;, they call it. <br><br>Might haveta winch out. <br><br>Gonna do a wheelie on that there gopher mound now, Smokey. <br><br>Can you dig it, Smokey? <br><br>Got four on the floor and four in the air on that one, didn`t we? <br><br>Goodness gracious. `Bout ta bust my shocks. <br><br>[Back to our regularly-scheduled rhyming. Add the sound of wailing sirens.] <br><br>Well, that Jeep of mine made Smokey whine<br>His rig was made of lead<br>He was mired in fourteen feet of mud<br>So he radioed ahead<br>I pulled up onto the blacktop<br>Went crashin` on through the rail<br>Sakes alive! I had twenty-five more<br>Smokeys on my tail! <br><br>Now I had racin` stripes and dual pipes<br>And Smokey had a Ford<br>Had a mill with a four pot carb, you know<br>But Smokey`s stroked and bored<br>Well, the race was on, but I had the edge<br>With a rig that`ll never fail<br>Got a CJ-5 with a four-wheel drive<br>Settin` out back a` the jail