Where The Hell Have You Been

You know my inside pockets Got my outside twin So badly indisposed I think I`ll dust my bin And all the while you`re making eyes at me You could be doing something useful Like climbing up a tree Who knows there may be something lurking Like a koala bear All the way from down under But don`t ask me where And on the subject of Australia Did you know some wives Don`t mind when their husbands Get home at night Know what I mean Every time I get home late My wife says where the hell have you been Oh Helen do be careful lying in the sun Don`t mind what you take off Long as you`ve something on And all the while You give the neighbors a thrill You could be doing something useful Like climbing up a hill Okay so hills do not agree with you Then try one that`s flat Surely there`s no better way That`s better than that And on the subject of alternatives Did you know some guys Don`t mind when their girlfriends Get home at night Oh what a dream If I`m just a minute late My wife says where the hell have you been And all the while you`re making eyes I see You could be doing something useful Like climbing over me Now then there`s nothing to be frightened of I won`t let you fall Dare I say it I just hope That you`ll be enthralled And on the subject of enthrallment Do you know some wives Don`t mind when their husbands Come home at night Know what I mean Every time I get home late Mine says where the hell have you been