The I Interview

<br>Gary-Owens-Voice (GOV) guy comes onscreen, whipping out his lower-case "i" from a briefcase and he has a dialogue with a Rude Off-screen Voice (ROV):<br><br>GOV: Hi-ho everyone, I bet you don`t know what this is.<br><br>ROV: It looks like a small L with a ball on top.<br><br>GOV: Well, golly-gee, I never thought of it, but it does look something like an L with a ball on top.<br><br>ROV: Not something like, exactly like! You have the mind of a flea!<br><br>GOV: Quiet down now. This is the letter I. Many words start with the letter I.<br><br>ROV: (rudely mocking him) "Many words start with the letter I!"<br><br>GOV: And the one that springs to my mind is -- "Impolite." Now we don`t want to be impolite. (pause.) That means being rude, or discourteous, or having no manners.<br><br>ROV: (smart-alecky): Tell us all about it, bright boy!<br><br>GOV: Excuse me. (He walks off-stage; there comes several seconds of a loud scuffle, the suitcase bounces around. The GOV guy returns.) Try not to be impolite. And thank you for your time.