Fo Funky Stories

(Rodney O)<br>On the south side, Rodney O was now cruisin<br>All of a sudden my car stops movin<br>Could I be outta gas? Hell no<br>Last night I filled up at Texaco<br>Popped the hood, smoke started comin up<br>Looked around and some punks started runnin up<br>Reached into the car under the drivers seat<br>Showed the metal and they took off down the street<br>Then I said to myself I better find a phone<br>Better yet I better not leave my car alone<br>You know whats up when they be smokin the rocks<br>Come back and your car be on crates or blocks<br>Yo, Rodney O won`t go out like a biscuit<br>Better call triple A to come fix it<br>With all that went wrong looks like I lucked up<br>From down the street drivin up was a toe truck<br>Flagged him down got the 40 dollar hook up<br>Hit the car now its time for me to book up<br>Rollin out then I looked to my left<br>Saw the punks from before jackin somebody else<br>Funky stories<br><br>Fo` funky stories<br>1 down, 3 more to go yo<br><br>Playin some ball at the neighborhood jam<br>Feelin good cause every shot is goin in<br>I hit the winnin basket and I hollar out GAME<br>Get off the court and remember my name<br>But in through the door comes brother Joe Acker<br>Plays basketball like a middle linebacker<br>Shoes worn out, socks to his knees<br>Smellin like Bengay rollin up his sleeves<br>Yo, who got next he starts askin<br>Everybody knows brother Joe is good for hackin<br>Now he`s slappin on my arm when I dribble<br>I`m gettin mad and I`m frownin up a little<br>But I try to stay calm and all that <br>But next time down the court he jumps all over my back<br>Yo whats up wit all that? Why don`t you play right?<br>Cause if you ain`t, we can have a fist fight<br>He runs down the court like it was nothin<br>I run up to him cause I ain`t roughin<br>But he got the ball and made a shot<br>Everybody`s laughin now I`m callin for the rock<br>I take brother Joe to the hoop real strong<br>And this time he got hit the stomach wrong<br>He lost his air and fell down<br>I jumped in the air, double pumped and I threw it down<br>After that I had nothin to say<br>Cause I knew brother Joe was done for the day<br><br>Four funky stories<br>Two down two more to go<br><br>(Rodney O)<br>In the city one night me and Drew was rollin out<br>Headin to the store playin music was bowlin out<br>Got pulled over don`t know why and for what<br>Cop came to window and I said whassup?<br>Where ya goin son? Lemme see I.D.<br>And you`re registration for this S.C.C.<br>What`s the big deal did I run a red light?<br>Or do you just gotta mess with someone tonight?<br>He said don`t get smart I`ll write you up a citation<br>I said go ahead cause my time you`re wastin<br>And if ya want, you can search my Benz<br>So call for backup and invite ya friends<br>The cop got mad and said I`ll let ya go<br>I said I know cause ya can`t fade Rodney O<br>Funky stories<br><br>Three down one more to go yo<br><br>(General Jeff)<br>Hadda date with a fly cutie that I just met<br>She let me on like she was soft and wet<br>So I wanted to hook up A.S.A.P<br>And after the date get the goods immediatley<br>She told me on the phone everything was her treat<br>She was gonna pick me up and take me out to eat<br>I gave her the directions to my place<br>But I took the wad just in case<br>And it was on meanin too good to be true<br>Reservation for two with a romantic view<br>Picked up the menu then I put it down<br>I didn`t know we was in the hottest place in town<br>But she smiled and looked at me like it was ok<br>Thats when I knew I`d be orderin til the next day<br>We made a toast friends for a long time<br>Knowin that later on I was gonna get mine<br>But I played the role real smooth<br>Actin like I wasn`t even in the mood<br>And when it came time for the check<br>The waiter came back and said the card was rejected<br>No sweat she pulled out another one<br>So I kicked back cause I was havin fun<br>Waiter came back same routine<br>I was on a date with a credit card queen<br>She left the table and went to the powder room<br>How come girls can never say bathroom?<br>But anyway she was gone for 20 minutes<br>The waiter thought that this was a plan and I was in it<br>I realized she was gone so I paid the tab<br>Went outside so I could call me a cab<br>I never saw the girl but I fell in love again<br>The cab driver happened to be my ex-girlfriend<br>Funky stories<br><br>Four down no more to go<br>No more to go