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Step Right Up

Исполнитель: Tom Waits

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<br>Step right up, step right up, step right up, <br>Everyone`s a winner, bargains galore<br>That`s right, you too can be the proud owner <br>Of the quality goes in before the name goes on<br>One-tenth of a dollar, one-tenth of a dollar, we got service after sales<br>You need perfume? we got perfume, how `bout an engagement ring?<br>Something for the little lady, something for the little lady,<br>Something for the little lady, hmm<br>Three for a dollar<br>We got a year-end clearance, we got a white sale <br>And a smoke-damaged furniture, you can drive it away today<br>Act now, act now, and receive as our gift, our gift to you<br>They come in all colors, one size fits all<br>No muss, no fuss, no spills, you`re tired of kitchen drudgery<br>Everything must go, going out of business, going out of business<br>Going out of business sale<br>Fifty percent off original retail price, skip the middle man<br>Don`t settle for less<br>How do we do it? how do we do it? volume, volume, turn up the volume<br>Now you`ve heard it advertised, don`t hesitate<br>Don`t be caught with your drawers down, <br>Don`t be caught with your drawers down<br>You can step right up, step right up<br>That`s right, it filets, it chops, it dices, slices,<br>Never stops, lasts a lifetime, mows your lawn<br>And it mows your lawn and it picks up the kids from school<br>It gets rid of unwanted facial hair, it gets rid of embarrassing age spots,<br>It delivers a pizza, and it lengthens, and it strengthens<br>And it finds that slipper that`s been at large <br>under the chaise lounge for several weeks<br>And it plays a mean Rhythm Master,<br>It makes excuses for unwanted lipstick on your collar<br>And it`s only a dollar, step right up, it`s only a dollar, step right up<br>`Cause it forges your signature<br>If not completely satisfied, mail back unused portion of product<br>For complete refund of price of purchase<br>Step right up<br>Please allow thirty days for delivery, don`t be fooled by cheap imitations<br>You can live in it, live in it, laugh in it, love in it<br>Swim in it, sleep in it,<br>Live in it, swim in it, laugh in it, love in it<br>Removes embarrassing stains from contour sheets, that`s right<br>And it entertains visiting relatives, it turns a sandwich into a banquet<br>Tired of being the life of the party? <br>Change your shorts, change your life, change your life<br>Change into a nine-year-old Hindu boy, get rid of your wife, <br>And it walks your dog, and it doubles on sax<br>Doubles on sax, you can jump back Jack, see you later alligator<br>See you later alligator<br>And it steals your car<br>It gets rid of your gambling debts, it quits smoking<br>It`s a friend, and it`s a companion, <br>And it`s the only product you will ever need<br>Follow these easy assembly instructions it never needs ironing<br>Well it takes weights off hips, bust, thighs, chin, midriff,<br>Gives you dandruff, and it finds you a job, it is a job<br>And it strips the phone company free take ten for five exchange,<br>And it gives you denture breath<br>And you know it`s a friend, and it`s a companion<br>And it gets rid of your traveler`s checks<br>It`s new, it`s improved, it`s old-fashioned<br>Well it takes care of business, never needs winding, <br>Never needs winding, never needs winding<br>Gets rid of blackheads, the heartbreak of psoriasis,<br>Christ, you don`t know the meaning of heartbreak, buddy,<br>C`mon, c`mon, c`mon, c`mon<br>`Cause it`s effective, it`s defective, it creates household odors, <br>It disinfects, it sanitizes for your protection<br>It gives you an erection, it wins the election<br>Why put up with painful corns any longer?<br>It`s a redeemable coupon, no obligation, no salesman will visit your home<br>We got a jackpot, jackpot, jackpot, prizes, prizes, prizes, all work guaranteed<br>How do we do it, how do we do it, how do we do it, how do we do it<br>We need your business, we`re going out of business<br>We`ll give you the business<br>Get on the business end of our going-out-of-business sale<br>Receive our free brochure, free brochure<br>Read the easy-to-follow assembly instructions, batteries not included<br>Send before midnight tomorrow, terms available, <br>Step right up, step right up, step right up<br>You got it buddy: the large print giveth, and the small print taketh away<br>Step right up, you can step right up, you can step right up<br>C`mon step right up<br>(Get away from me kid, you bother me...)<br>Step right up, step right up, step right up, c`mon, c`mon, c`mon, c`mon, c`mon<br>Step right up, you can step right up, c`mon and step right up,<br>C`mon and step right up

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Tom Waits

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