The wedding

<br>The father who sired her handed her over<br> the crack-handed orchestra played<br>The bride and the groom stood shoulder-to-shoulder<br> as the ill-starred wedding was made<br><br>She lifted her veil as the groom gently kissed her<br> and all did appear to be well<br>But the limousine driver heard every harsh whisper<br> as they drove to the country hotel<br><br>In the Grand Hotel ballroom the guests were assembling<br> the champagne like tapwater flowed<br>The men wearing top hats, and fop coats and top coats<br> the women in bustles and bows<br>The brideжЉЇ jealous sister sat alone in her place<br> and sneered as the couple came in <br>The maitre-de coughed and said жЏљlease take your places,<br> the Banquet is about to begin?<br>The street doors burst open and an army of footman<br> swept in bearing salvers and trays<br>Fiddlers and clowns went from table to table<br> amid black smoke and cigarette haze<br>Noone saw the best man as he secretly winked<br> at the brideжЉЇ jealous sister it seemed<br>And then cried out жЏҐaiter, Bring me more drink<br> and more Marilyn Monroe ice-cream?<br>When the wine had been poured and the tables were cleared<br> the toasts and the speeches began<br>The bride and groom cut the cake, everyone cheered!<br> then all eyes fell on the best man.<br>He climbed off his chair, and he licked his cracked lips<br> and declared in a voice cold and dry<br>жЏќhe tricked and hijacked him, with guilt she trapped him<br> this day is a sham and a lie?<br>Her father leapt up with a curse and a roar<br> and slew the best man in the head<br>The groom cried жЏѓlaggard!?and with a flash of his sword<br> his father-in-law fell down dead<br>The bride ran screaming in floods of bright tears<br> and collapsed at the foot of the stairs<br>Where her sister was waiting with scissors and shears<br> and hacked off every inch of her hair.<br><br>Up on the roof sat seven fat crows, the moon rose low in the west.<br> the groom was arrested still in his wedding clothes<br>And hanged in his pants and his vest<br> the bald-headed bride bought a ticket to Spain<br>And eloped with a wig-makers son <br> while her jealous mad sister, riven with shame<br>Became a nun!