Dysfunctional

<br>Endless parade of gross perversions<br>Like pins pushed into my brain<br>However short-lived it may be<br>I remember the sweetness of the pain<br>Is the greater sin the act I committed<br>Or the lie later expressing disgust<br>That doesn`t exist most of the time<br>A lack of morals or a lack of trust?<br>No more blood in my heart<br>Just concrete pouring in<br>Protection from conviction<br>Mortared by my sin<br>My face slowly turns to stone<br>No one gets inside<br>Now I have my secret place<br>Now I can hide<br>The white I wore in my dreams<br>Irrevocably blackened<br>Anger settling over my eyes<br>At finding myself lacking<br>I let them into my darkest halls<br>And I hate myself for it<br>They never knew as they overturned things<br>What was being destroyed<br>Replaying and reliving<br>The dark passages of my life<br>Smiling as I wreak the vengeance<br>I can never realize<br>My hands and eyes stay on me<br>I have made my choice<br>The big man I am inside<br>Will never use my voice<br>I make the lame excuses I heard before<br>And didn`t tolerate<br>I look into the mirror<br>And what I see I surely hate<br>Wretch that I am<br>Who`ll free me from the body of death<br>The answer`s written in my stone<br>Waiting for my breath