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Talkin` karate blues

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Жанры : folk singer-songwriter country americana alt-country

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by Townes Van Zandt

Well, I ain`t very big for twentyone
and it seems I never could have any good clean fun
cause every time I`d go outside some great big bully`d come along
he`d hit me in the face and he`d knock to the ground
and he`d start kickin` me all around
and that ain`t exactly fair, friends, that`s wrong.

So I got me a paper the other night
and I crawled up on the sofa and I turned on the light
and flipped through the pages till I found the classified ads.
Said, "take karate from Lee Hung Chow;
man, make your first appointment now
this course is guaranteed to make you bad."

Well, the next day I drove to the address
by japanese design I was really impressed
it looked like a regular house of the rising sun.
I walked inside, I was all alone
I had a nervous feeling down in my bones
I was kind of sorry I`d ever even come.

Then a giant jap came through the door
he must have been about seven foot four
and he looked like he`s prone to easy aggrevation.
He said, "Lee Hung Chow, Ah kee dung"
that`s japanese for fee fie foo fum
I tried to explain my entire situation.

He said, "Number one course, yankee, self defence,
twohundred dollars and twentyfive cents";
I said "What`s the twentyfive cents for?" and he said, "Repairs."
I said, "Repairs to what?", and he said "To you"
and I thought to myself "Man, that won`t do"
felt about a half inch tall under that ol` slender stare

Ah, you think he was yellow...

I said, "I believe I better go check another place"
he said, "Ha so, Yankee don`t like my race"
I said, "Now, there`s a mistake, man, and that`s true;
I`ve been for you you japanese all along
you japanese just can`t do no wrong
and I thought you got mighty dirty deal in World War II."

Well, he grabbed me by the hand and gave a heave
I figured there`s a pretty good time to leave
before he had a chance to do me any definite harm.
But my plan worked out in the end, you see,
now no bully is gonna pick on me
who`s gonna hit a fellow with just one arm?

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