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Артист: Bloodhound GangНазвание : A Lap Dance Is So Much Better When the Stripper isДанные: текст песни / слова песни Жанры : rock alternative alternative rock punk comedy Видео:
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I was lonelier than Kunta Kinte at a Merle Haggard concert That night I strolled on into Uncle Limpy`s Hump Palace lookin` for love. It had been a while. In fact, three hundred and sixty-five had come and went since that midnight run haulin` hog to Shakey Town on I-10. I had picked up this hitchhiker that was sweatin` gallons through a pair of Daisy Duke cut-offs and one of those Fruit Of The Loom tank-tops. Well, that night I lost myself to ruby red lips, milky white skin and baby blue eyes. Name was Russell. Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin` Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin` Well I find it`s quite a thrill When she grinds me against her will Yes a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin` Well, faster than you can say, "shallow grave", this pretty little thing come up to me and starts kneadin` my balls like hard-boiled eggs in a tube sock. Said her name was Bambi and I said, "Well that`s a coincidence darlin`, `cause I was just thinkin` about skinnin` you like a deer." Well she smiled, had about as much teeth as a Jack-O-Lantern, and I went on to tell her how I would wear her face like a mask as I do my little kooky dance. And then she told me to shush. I guess she could sense my desperation. `Course, it`s hard to hide a hard-on when you`re dressed like Minnie Pearl. Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin` Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin` Well I find it`s quite a thrill When she grinds me against her will Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin` So, Bambi`s goin` on about how she can make all my fantasies come true. So I says, "Even this one I have where Jesus Christ is jackhammering Mickey Mouse in the doo-doo hole with a lawn dart as Garth Brooks gives birth to something resembling a cheddar cheese log with almonds on Santa Claus`s tummy-tum?" Well, ten beers, twenty minutes and thirty dollars later I`m parkin` the beef bus in tuna town if you know what I mean. Got to nail her back at her trailer. Heh. That rhymes. I have to admit it was even more of a turn-on when I found out she was doin` me to buy baby formula. Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin` Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin` Well I find it`s quite a thrill When she grinds me against her will Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin` Day or so had passed when I popped the clutch, gave the tranny a spin and slid on into The Stinky Pinky Gulp N` Guzzle Big Rig Snooze-A-Stop. There I was browsin` through the latest issue of "Throb", when I saw Bambi starin` at me from the back of a milk carton. Well, my heart just dropped. So, I decided to do what any good Christian would. You can not imagine how difficult it is to hold a half gallon of moo juice and polish the one-eyed gopher when your doin` seventy-five in an eighteen-wheeler. I never thought missing children could be so sexy. Did I say that out loud? Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin` Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin` Well I find it`s quite a thrill When she grinds me against her will Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin` | Похожие исполнители:
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